nottakinmyheart (nottakinmyheart) wrote,

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lifes a two way street get over it honey...

well, i had a boyfriend for about five days. then he tells me tht he just wants to hang out and not take it as fast. that he likes some other girls. which i dont care. but i feel like second best and that i have to beg him to spend time with him. hes seen the other girl like two almost three times this week. i love her too death anyway, but it doesnt change how my feelings have kind of been disgreguarded in a way.

i wasnt even pushing anything in the relationship either. we just talked and hung out with friends. now if i ask him to hang out hes like, we'll see. he barely ask me if i want to hang out anymore. and then when i ask him hes usually going to hang out with friends or with her as well and everyone else. its like i dont even exist anymore. he had mentioned something about going to the museum the week before and he never brought it back up after he said he just wanted to hang out and stuff like that. i didnt bring it up because i wanted to see if hed remember or at least think about it a little. but he didnt.

we are supposedly going to hang out tonight but i'm nervous. i feel like i'm forcing him to even though i just asked and he said it was ok. but i feel like its more of an obligation than something he would rather do. i just wish people would stop changing their minds. if you like me fine, thats all good. if you dont, dont play games with me or what ever they are called.

most of my friends are guys and i like one other person as well. he is very nice too. but i dont know him aswell as i know the other guy yet. and as far as a serious relationship goes eventually in the far future, i dont know. if people keep on playing these mind games with me i just might as well give up altogether. like i was doing in the first place. its a hell of a lot easier then getting your heart stomped on all the time.
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